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Cambridge Certificate of Proficiency in English

 

Paper 2: Composition

Contents:

Example Paper

 

Only write what you KNOW is RIGHT

 

Summing up

Your list of 'favourite' mistakes

 

Check...mistakes SEPARATELY

Sample compositions:no.1

(in preparation)

Do NOT copy your work out

Don't make...mistakes...by being too ambitious

 

………………………: no 2

Keep EXACTLY to your timetable

 

Use simple language

………………………: no.3

Write on the subject the paper tells you to

Essay construction - don't waste time on it

………………………: no.4

 

back to Composition Contents

Example paper

PAPER 2 COMPOSITION

 

2 hours

 

Write two only of the following compositions. Follow the instructions exactly.

 

1 Describe a street you know well and explain what it means to you personally. (About 350 words.)

 

2 What duties do children owe to their parents, and parents to their children? (About 350 words.)

 

3 Write a story beginning with the words: When I knocked on the door of my parents' house, it was opened by a man who said nobody by my father's name had ever lived there. (About 350 words.)

 

4 You have just returned from an expensive package holiday organised by a well-known tour operator. Many of the promises made in their brochure were unfulfilled. Write a letter of complaint asking for compensation. (About 300 words.)

 

5 [This fifth question will ask you to write about 350 words on a subject connected with one of the three books you can study (if you want to – you do not have to) for this part of the examination. The books will be different each year. My advice is that you should not try to write on these book subjects unless you have a really good and experienced teacher of literature to help you. And even then, you must remember that studying these books will take time and energy away from your study of English as a language. You can always read books both before you prepare for the examination, and afterwards!]

 

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Your list of 'favourite' mistakes

Immediately you sit down at your place in the examination room, take a piece of paper and write down on it the list of the mistakes that you tend to make.

Put the list in front of you where you can see it, and look at it often, as you write, to remind yourself of your own special problems. If you do this you will find it very difficult to make those particular mistakes. Here is an imaginary example of what a personal list might be for students of English as a foreign language:

 

Past/Present Perfect

NOT 'do something for doing' (purpose)

NOT 'the nature, the life'

since: NOT 'since three weeks'

NOT 'suggest somebody to do'

word order: NOT 'I eat seldom eggs'

if: NOT 'if I would'

NOT 'by my car'

NOT 'bigger as'

NOT 'a so beautiful town'

 

which, by the time the examination comes, you should have been able to turn into a 'shorthand' list, like this:

 

Past/Present

Perfect Purpose

the

since

suggest

Word order

if

Transport prepositions

Comparisons

so/such

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Do NOT copy your work out

It is an exam in the English language, not in handwriting! It is madness to copy your composition out again, so whatever you do, don't! Time that you might spend copying it out must be spent on essential things (such as those 'favourite' mistakes).

Many people, in fact, make their writing harder to read, not easier, when they copy out, because they do it in such a tearing hurry. What is more, many people make mistakes in copying that were not in their original. Write carefully the first and only time, making sure the examiner can read your writing.

Write on every second line.

 

                   make                  can cross it out            write

Then, if you do a mistake, you should take it away and do your correction

clearly

/on the line above. Don't draw a lot of balloons and arrows and confuse

 

yourself as well as the examiners.

 

Don't let your line become complicated, with lots of bits added on to it. If

necessary, cross the whole line out and write it again above.

essential when it is erase the all the line for making new line 

 

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Keep EXACTLY to your timetable

 

First composition

45 minutes

Second composition

45 minutes

Checking

30 minutes

 

At the end of 45 minutes stop, and start the second composition, even if you are in the middle of a sentence. Rigid self-discipline is essential here.

Do not write too much. You are wasting time if you do; and the more you write the more possibilities there are for making mistakes.

Stop at the end of 45 minutes even if you have not written the number of words they have told you to write. You can write a little more later.

There is a little practical trick you can use to count the number of words you have written, not only in your compositions but in any parts of an exam where you need to know how many. Never actually count each separate word you write in an exam. That is a terrible waste of valuable time. Instead, long before the exam, in fact when you first start preparing for it, find out how many words you personally write on average in three lines. Then, when you want to know at any time how many words you have written, you need only quickly count how many groups of three lines there are.

 

Write on the subject the paper tells you to write on

You must write about the subject set in the examination; don't change the subject and write about something slightly or completely different. Follow the instructions on the paper.

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Only write what you KNOW IS RIGHT

You cannot pass with lots of mistakes, however clever you intend your sentences to be. Remember that you must show the examiner what you know, not what you do not know. If you do not make mistakes, and you write on the subject they ask you to write on, you are certain to get fairly good marks at least, even perhaps very good marks. So if you are not absolutely sure that what you want to write is correct, do not write it. Write something different.

In a composition nobody makes you write particular words, so don't make yourself do so. It is quite true that the examiners will want you to use English that suits the subject. But your English will not suit the subject if it is wrong.

It is an examination in English, not in philosophy or originality.

For this reason, too, if you have a choice of subjects you should not always choose the subjects that interest you or that you like. Choose the subjects that you know most English about. If you are crazy about boats and the sea, for example, and one of the subjects given happens to be 'sailing', do not write about them unless you know the English words you must use. Choose another subject.

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Check for each of your 'favourite' mistakes SEPARATELY

If at the end of 90 minutes you find you have written too few words, you will have to add a few more. But finish as quickly as you can.

You should spend as much as possible of your final period - 30 minutes - on checking in the way I have described above (Examination technique – Checking). This may make the difference between you passing and not passing the whole examination. It is more important to finish the paper and check than to have beautiful, perfect endings.

Please, whatever you do, never leave the examination room early, however much you are dying for a cigarette or a cup of coffee. There is always important work for you to do. You cannot check too often, if you do it in the right way.

I would like to make a special suggestion to all speakers of languages without definite or indefinite articles (the and a). For you the problem is usually, of course, that you leave the article out. So it is no good worrying in a general way about articles, however passionately, because you cannot study what is not there!

You must think about nouns.

When you check, think about every noun you have written in turn and decide whether it needs an article, and if so, which. (Chinese- and Japanese-speakers, among others, should ask themselves three questions about every noun, in the following order:

1 Should it be plural?

2 Should there be a preposition?

3 Should there be an article?

The question about the article comes last because the answer often depends on the answer to the first two questions.)

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Don't make avoidable mistakes through being too ambitious

There is something very important to bear in mind about the Proficiency essays.

I emphasize again the point I made in my introductory section. My advice is not for those who are confident they can write a grade A essay. It is for those who worry that they will not be able to write well enough.     

One of the worst things you can do if you are not confident is to try to be clever. You will almost certainly get low marks for your Proficiency essays if you try to do what you cannot do because you feel you have to write very 'advanced', very elegant, very sophisticated language. You may be impressed by the high standard of Proficiency. But an essential way in which it is high is that you must quite simply not make a lot of mistakes. Mistakes that are allowed in lower level exams are not permissible at the Proficiency level.

It is true that the University of Cambridge Local Examinations Syndicate have written that in the Proficiency examination candidates are "expected to demonstrate some sophistication of language use; narrowness of expression, i.e. over-simplistic [sic – see note 2] language or a limited range, although accurate, may not be enough to achieve a satisfactory level in the [composition] paper."

But they will also be looking for correct grammar, punctuation and spelling, and use of the right words. As the Syndicate have pointed out in the past, candidates are often below standard "because their control of language is not adequate for the thoughts they wish to express" and they go in for "the meaningless contortions of 'translatese"'.

The Syndicate has provided a table which summarizes the "criteria for assessment". These criteria divide compositions into seven categories.

 

marks out of 20

criteria for assessment

19-20

Excellent control and selection of language, virtually error-free; outstanding in treatment of task

16-18

Clear evidence of sophisticated language used with only occasional native-speaker-type lapses; ambitious in concept and approach

11-15

Reasonably fluent and natural language with only occasional minor errors; task well developed, with appropriate treatment of the rubric.

8-10

Ideas communicated but language limited or marred by error; task attempted but not adequately realized.

5-7

Lack of language control shown by numerous errors; topic area neither extended nor explored.

1-4

Errors and narrowness of expression impede communication; content irrelevant or length of writing too short.

   0

Totally irrelevant, or too little language for assessment.

 

This is not as informative as one would like it to be. But I think it makes it clear that you are not going to get more than 10 marks if you make a lot of bad mistakes.

So we must come back to the basic principle. Do not show the examiner what you do not know. It is useless to be ambitious in a composition if you do not have the means for achieving your ambition. It is useless to attempt a style you cannot achieve in the foreign language. It is useless to use words you do not know how to use. It is useless to try to produce everything that the examiners require if all you produce is incorrect grammar, illogical sentences and the wrong words.

If you are very, very good at the foreign language - and, as I say, my advice is not for you - you will perhaps be able to express yourself as effectively in the foreign language as you can in your own. But most people cannot get anywhere near this, and it is foolish to try. The only results will be that you use words in the wrong way, that you write 'translatese' nonsense (translating direct from your own language), that you produce muddled, illogical sentences, and make grammar mistakes that you would never make in simpler, less ambitious sentences.

Examiners may not like the simple subject-verb-object type of sentence very much. But a subject-verb-object sentence that is right is much better than a confused complicated sentence that is wrong. Bad mistakes cannot be sophisticated language.

 

(But in preparing for writing discussion-type essays it is well worth learning a number of beginnings to sentences or paragraphs. I list some suggestions for these below. The material in brackets can be replaced by other material.


This is clearly (a problem, an issue etc.) of the greatest importance.
This is (a problem, an issue etc.) of vital interest to (everybody etc.).
This is (a problem, an issue etc.) about which I feel very strongly.
This problem concerns all of us.
This is one of the most important (problems, issues, etc.) facing the world today.
I think we must first define what we mean by (democracy, education, etc.).
It depends what we mean by (democracy etc.).
It depends how we define (democracy etc.).
Since (human beings etc.) first appeared on the Earth (men etc.) have (oppressed women etc.).
From the earliest times (the individual) has (been the victim of society).
The situation has changed considerably since (those days etc.).
For the last (five decades etc.) oil has (dominated the world economy etc.).
(Education, oil etc.) has (three main purposes, two great advantages etc.).
By far the most important (purpose is to…, advantage is that…)
Let's take (rail transport, the underprivileged etc.) first.
First……Second……Lastly/Finally……
Where (road transport, the middle classes) is/are concerned...
(People, Experts, Politicians etc.) have been looking for solutions to this problem (for many years) etc.
It seems as if very little can be done about (it, the problem, etc.)

(Scientists etc.) have been trying to find an effective answer to the problem (for years now) (but so far without success).
As yet, nobody has succeeded in finding a satisfactory solution.
Several solutions/plans have been put forward.
The fact remains that…
This (solution, suggestion, plan etc.) is all very well, but…
This (solution etc.) has serious (snags, drawbacks).
There is one serious snag (and that is that…)
I think it is questionable whether (prison ever does any good to anyone etc.).
The great advantage of (the microchip etc.) is that…
A good thing about (the new technique) is…
A very encouraging development is (the way that etc.)…
We must consider the (social aspect etc.) as well.
There is (not much, quite a lot etc.) to be said in (its, their etc.) favour/in favour of
(This plan etc.) has the further advantage that…
The same applies to (universities, the developing countries, amateur sport etc.).
This is also true of (air travel, team sports etc.)
On the other hand…
The (practical, political, economic) considerations are not the only ones.
Some people argue that…
It is often maintained that…
A favourite argument is that…
There is a widespread belief that…
One of the main arguments heard in favour of … is that
(Opponents of, Supporters of this argument etc.) assert/maintain that…
What the people who argue like this seem to forget is that…
Many people fail to realize that…
It is not often realized that…
A point that is (often, usually etc.) missed is that…
But that is a false argument (because…, in view of the fact that…etc.)
This is not really a tenable position.
This is an untenable position.
There is a serious flaw/are several flaws in (this, their etc.) argument.
I am firmly convinced that…
I am strongly in favour of (
noun, or –ing).
I am (totally, bitterly) opposed to …
I would argue that…
With (a car you can stop wherever you want) whereas (with a train you are much more limited in this respect etc.).

Although these are naturally only a few out of hundreds of possible expressions, they will take you quite a long way If you can learn thirty or so of these, and use some of them at the right point, you will find that not only do they greatly impress the examiner, but that they take up a nice lot of words on the page, thereby saving you the trouble and time of thinking of some more ideas to fill up the space with. But do remember that you cannot just throw them in whenever you think it's time for another nice idiomatic expression. YOU MUST FIT THEM CAREFULLY TO THE CONTEXT. DON'T USE ANY YOU DO NOT FULLY UNDERSTAND THE USE OF.)

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Use simple language

So again and again we must come back to the truth that it is no good showing the examiner what you cannot do. And do not despise short sentences and simple language. Two of the finest twentieth-century writers in English on the sort of subject you will often be asked to write compositions on were Bertrand Russell and George Orwell. They both wrote simply and clearly, often in very short sentences. You will find you can often keep yourself out of trouble by remembering that the full stop is your best friend.

I must also give a special warning against building too many sentences around nouns. Sentences based on nouns are not only often unEnglish; they tend to be much more difficult to get right. Much more knowledge is needed to fit nouns correctly into a sentence, because for them the linguistic conventions tend to be far stricter. One has to know the particular verbs, the particular adjectives, the particular prepositions that fit a given noun. One usually has far greater freedom if one makes verbs the key words of one's sentences; one is much less likely to make mistakes with sentences based on verbs.

For instance:

These cars can travel at very high speeds.

This is a simple example of a noun-based sentence. It is based on speeds. To get it right we have to know that:

(a) speed can be used as a countable as well as an uncountable noun;

(b) high - not fast - is the conventional adjective with speed;

(c) at is the right preposition with speed;

(d) travel is a correct verb with speed - go would not be truly idiomatic in this sentence.

But if we choose go as the key to our sentence, we have no need of any special knowledge of that kind. We simply say:

These cars can go very fast.

You personally may have known all the points (a)-(d) that I have explained above. But I hope you can understand the principle. Here is a more complicated example where you may not know the various 'rules' of vocabulary.

Doubts might be entertained in certain quarters as to whether an alternative procedure might not, in preference, be adopted.

The sentence is formed around the nouns doubts, quarters, procedure and preference. First of all we have to know that those are themselves the right nouns to use.

Having got that far we have to know that entertain and adopt are the right verbs for doubts and procedure, that the adjective alternative suits procedure, that in is the right preposition for both quarters and preference, and that the proper expression linking doubts and the second part of the sentence is as to whether. Isn't it better to say what the sentence in practice simply means?

Some people might think there is a better way

Here the verbs think and is are the key words.

 

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Essay construction: don't waste time on it

The Syndicate say that the language rather than content is the main concern in the marking of the compositions, and that marks are not deducted for unorthodox opinions. But it also says that candidates are expected to present their arguments logically, and that the material should be well organized, both "as a whole and in terms of individual paragraphs." There should be a clear pattern of connected ideas. Essays do not have to be particularly original or interesting, but the examiners may criticize candidates for not dealing with the subject properly, or for jumping suddenly from one point to another.

However, do not forget that examiners' judgement of these things is to quite a large extent subjective. No two examiners are going to mark a composition exactly alike in these respects.

It is therefore impossible to know in advance how the examiners are going to judge your compositions as regards organization and the development of your ideas. So in your preparation for the examination, I believe that spending time and effort on essay organization, if you are still making a lot of mistakes in your grammar and vocabulary, is a luxury you cannot afford. A sense of proportion is needed here. Please get your grammar and vocabulary right first.

Grammar and vocabulary are objective problems. You can know definitely whether you are right or wrong. Concentrate on this area of certainty, not on the vague uncertainty of beautifully constructed essays. If you can write largely without mistakes, and keep to the subject, you will be very unlucky if you do not get at least reasonable marks. You might even get very good ones. But you won't if you make bad mistakes, however well your essay is organized.

Once again you must be firm with your teacher. If your composition teacher spends time on essay construction, talking to you about how to produce striking beginnings, elegantly developed middle sections and effective endings, and about details like paragraphing, you should ask her or him whether these things are going to make the difference between passing and failing for you personally; whether she or he is confident that you have already shown that your practical command of grammar and vocabulary is so good that there is no doubt that you will pass as far as they are concerned; whether all that is needed to tip the balance is some training in essay construction.

(My advice should perhaps be modified in one respect here, however. If you can master a small set of elegant opening sentences that you know are absolutely right and that can be adapted to a variety of subjects, and can use one of them at the beginning of each composition in an exam, you may well influence the examiner in your favour. Exam markers are human too. While a single superb sentence right at the end of an otherwise mediocre or downright poor composition is unlikely to do you any extra good, at the very beginning it will very possibly make the examiner think more kindly about the rest. But you must be careful. Don't use such prepared sentences unless you are absolutely sure they fit the context.)

 

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Summing up

The biggest mistake you can make in the composition paper is to aim too high. We can finally put this aspect of the Proficiency essays another way:

If you try to be "ambitious in concept and approach" and try to use "natural language", and fail to do so, the best you can hope for is precisely that: that you fail to achieve those things.

But the worst and more probable result is that your mistakes will cause you to lose far more marks than you would have lost if you had not been so ambitious.

So wherever you are not absolutely certain of yourself: KEEP IT SIMPLE.

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Note 1. In fact both "would" and "will" are found with if in English, but the situations in life which are expressed by "if…will" or "if…would" are rather rare. You can find an explanation of this on the Questions & Answers page. The problem for German-speakers – and others – is that they tend to use the "if…would" and "if…will" combinations for practically all conditional (if) situations, where it is almost always wrong.

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Note 2. It is a rather shocking fact that the word "simplistic" is used incorrectly here in the Syndicate's 1998 CPE handbook. You can check this for yourself if you look in the New Oxford dictionary of English, first published in 1998. What the writer really means is no more than "simple".

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Practical information

 

Sets of past Certificate of Proficiency examination papers can be obtained direct from:

University of Cambridge Local Examinations Syndicate (UCLES)

Syndicate Buildings

1 Hills Road

Cambridge CB1 2EU

United Kingdom

e-mail: helpdesk@ocr.org.uk

(These are quite expensive - they now cost over £5 each.)

 

The Syndicate also publishes from time to time a Certificate of Proficiency Handbook, which contains detailed information about the examination. (This is free.)

 

You can get information about the Syndicate's examinations in English as a Foreign Language at:

e-mail efl@ucles.org.uk

tel. +44 1223 553355

fax +44 1223 460278

and at their web site www.cambridge-efl.org.uk

 

The Cambridge University Press (The Edinburgh Building, Cambridge CB2 2RU, U.K. e-mail: eltmail@cup.cam.ac.uk ) publishes volumes of earlier Proficiency exam papers. They are entitled:

Cambridge Proficiency Examination Practice, followed by the number of the volume. (At least 6 have been published so far.) Each volume contains 5 sets of practice tests. There is also a teacher's book, with answers, to go with each volume.

 

If you have any questions you would like to ask about English, or about preparing and taking the Proficiency examination, please write to the editor. He will do his best to give satisfactory answers on the Questions and Answers page. Your name will not be published without your permission.

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